Me: Where the Hell are those bastards that are supposed to be finishing the carpet!?
Wife: You do know they hear everything you say and mimic it?
Me: The carpet layers heard that?
Wife: Your kids.
Me: My kids will know there are only 3 reasonable excuses for swearing: one, when quoting the bible, two, when angry or annoyed, or three, when it makes a joke or story funnier. Most other times its totally inappropriate and there will probably be negative consequences.
Wife: At least you set a high standard.
Me: Damn straight.
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